Wednesday 26 June 2013

Flowery Skirts and Band Shirts

I've gone through a lot of "phases": the girly phase; the rocker phase (also known as listening to Avril Lavigne and wearing one glove - I, naturally still listen to the Lavigne... whilst baking); the tomboy phase... In truth, "phases" don't exist. There are similar interests and loves, but no one is defined by one single movement of some sort that is considered a binding epitome of one person. Instead, there are individual personalities and different people and characteristics. Yet, why are there these labels? These words that categorise people: defining living and breathing human beings, not allowing anyone to actually be what they are... an individual. It should be known that I don't think every label should (if you think of it in a certain way) have a negative connotation, but for me they don't define everything about me. I don't think these judgements are even lost as one grows up into an adult that stands, individually on one's own feet: there are "the mothers"; "the ones that are swimming in money"; "those who are always on a plane"...

I go from wearing flowery skirts to wearing black skinny jeans and band t-shirts because that's who I am but yet if I were to meet someone on one of my more "feminine days", my new acquaintance would name me a girly-girl, I'd presume. If I met someone while wearing a Blink-182 top, I'd be sure to be named "emo" or some other name that certainly shouldn't define people that like a certain type of music (unless you'd like to be named it, of course) and also doesn't define the side of me that loves flowers (not that "emo"s shouldn't be expected to not like flowers... that's not what I mean*). What I find annoying is that when I'm wearing a flowery skirt, I'd still be my boyish self, wanting to be at home watching Star Wars or when I'm clothed in my favourite band tee, I may be thinking about how pretty that girl's dress is and how I want it. I, therefore, am not defined by one aspect of my personality: my clothes (for other people it may be their make-up, or them not wearing make-up, their love for sport, their love of baking etc etc). There are many aspects to who I am, so why look at someone and decide, there and then, who they are. Is that really fair?

So, assuming you've come to the conclusion that no, that's not fair, why is it human nature to judge the book by the cover? So maybe you're not judging who's underneath, maybe that part of the phase of judging people has passed, but are you still labelling the "phase"? Grunge. Indie. Wannabe-Indie. You geddit? If I think about this when I'm out and about, I feel self-conscious. That girl that's just briefly looked at me: is she labelling me something, giving me a description without knowing me? It's not a particularly warming thought. In this generation, it's definitely a natural thing to do. *When a "Wannabe-Indie" passes*: "I bet she doesn't even know three of songs of the band that girl's wearing the T-shirt of". Ok, maybe she doesn't know who the Rolling Stones are, but maybe she does! How could you possibly know? Even if she doesn't know, what does it matter? What does the exterior of a "phase" really matter?

"Phases", if that's how we must define them can be important. It can establish one's music taste, how they feel about a particular topic, how they act towards people. Maybe. Ultimately, that's down to the person: who they listen to, what they believe, how they act towards people. It could be considered to be a mixture of a phase and the individual to establish who they are as I certainly believe I owe aspects of myself to growing up with McFly but all of these things are the good parts! Phases or no phases, they've moulded who I am. I think the point of this post is that:

1) Don't label people because:
i. A label is not who someone is;
ii. A label doesn't define every single aspect of someone's personality.

2) "Phases" can be important.

3) "Phases" aren't necessarily "phases" as my love for McFly will be with me forever and ever - and that's a fact and if people consider this a "phase" under whatever category of broader "phases", then it's not.

Odd Socks & Party Poppers,

The Girl in the Moonlight.

*I am trying SO hard to be politically correct!

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